BOWWBLOG #34: The Unwrappable Gift: What I Found Beneath the Bells and Whistles of the Season
A birthday reflection on the three gifts we all hunger for—and how to find them within
WHAT: The Gift That Wasn't Under the Tree
The best birthday—and Christmas—gift I have ever received didn't come in a box. It wasn't wrapped in shiny paper.
This year, my three adult children were away on my actual birthday, December 16th. Yet, the celebration had already happened two days prior, in the simple, unrushed warmth of our time together. On the day itself, I shared a wonderful breakfast with a dear friend and a joyful lunch with my 92-year-old father, his caregiver, and our family driver.
Nothing fancy. No bells and whistles. The gift was Presence. That sacred space of "right here, right now," where you can truly breathe and behold the person in front of you. It’s the same foundational space we cultivate in coaching—the act of being fully, undistractedly with another human being.
This presence deepens into its second form: Peace. Not the absence of noise, but a profound inner stillness—the "peace that surpasses understanding" glimpsed through decades of contemplative practice, from Centering Prayer to Vipassana. It is the quiet realization beneath the chatter of the self.
SO WHAT: The Season That Shows Us Our Layers
Birthdays and festive seasons have a double edge. They bring joy, but they also hold up a mirror, revealing how our minds and hearts have been shaped by a lifetime of conditioning—from family traditions to societal "shoulds."
We carry beliefs about who we are and how the world works that are so embedded, they run on autopilot. We forget these are merely "layers of skin" we can learn to shed. The hustle, the expectations, the pressure to perform holiday perfection—these are all layers.
The practices of Presence and Peace are not passive states; they are skills. They are disciplines honed in the daily gym of sitting or walking or being in silence and stillness. It is in that quiet space that we remember it is perfectly okay to peel away the "ought-tos" dictated by social norms and touch the truth of our own experience.
NOW WHAT: Your Inner Sanctuary Awaits
From this cultivated presence and peace arises the third gift: Purposeful Action. When we are no longer reacting from our conditioned layers, we can respond from a place of deep awareness. Our choices become more intentional, skillful, and wise. We act not from anxiety about outcomes, but from a grounded center. The result? We become, naturally, more loving, kinder, and more compassionate. We find ourselves happier, more peaceful, and liberated from self-made misery.
This is the heart of the season, regardless of your faith. You might call it Christ consciousness, Buddha nature, our highest Self, or simply our shared human capacity for love. The name does not matter. The experience is universal.
Your Call to Action: Unwrap Your Own Gift
This week, amidst the celebrations, I invite you to give yourself one truly unwrappable gift.
Create a "Silent Night" of Your Own.
When: Sometime before Christmas morning.
What: Just 10 minutes. Sit quietly. You don't need to meditate perfectly. Just be still.
How: Set a timer. Feel your breath. When thoughts about gifts, meals, or to-do lists arise (as they will), don't fight them. Just gently acknowledge them as another "layer," and return your attention to your breath.
Why: In that small pocket of stillness, you are not a host, a shopper, or a performer. You are simply you, beneath all the layers. You are practicing the presence and peace that is your true nature.
This is the deepest gift you can offer yourself and, by extension, everyone around you. A peaceful, present you is the greatest blessing to any gathering.
May your holidays be filled with the quiet joy of what is real. 🙏
-Susan Grace Rivera
Posted on: December 23, 2025
In this season of giving, we often pour our energy outward. But what is the gift you can give yourself as you step into 2026? Is it the gift of deeper connection? A structured space for your own growth? A tribe that reflects your values?
We created the TLC Membership Hub for exactly this purpose: to be your curated space for sustained wholeness. It’s more than a portal; it’s a community and a toolkit designed to nurture your journey as a leader and connector throughout the year.
Give yourself (and a colleague and friend or family!) the gift of a supported, integrated journey.
